Thursday, July 28, 2005

An Apple Powerbook or a Tablet PC or a Laptop???

I know.. we have addressed this before.. but I really cant decide.. now it has come to the crunch.. I have to decide and let some people know about what I zigackly want.
I want a DVD writer, 50 GB and above space... I dont need a webcam. I cant think of the rest!

So shoot up people!!!

Also an I Pod is something that I am gonna buy.. Options on how to buy that, because I am thinking of going through with my first online transaction!

Monday, July 25, 2005

My First Audio Blog :)

So here comes... refer to one of the previous posts for more info on this clip :)

My Mom enters Blogworld

So here she comes.. and you can check up her writings here!
In answer to the 'baaboo' who commented on my blog on not to write too much of technical stuff and ask me to get back to 'my usual' ways!!
Have signed up for audioblog. Will be putting up my first audio post. A song which I sang for this hugely popular duo called Bathiya and Santhush. I can say that this is my first 'international' venture. They came down and recorded and I happened to sing for them in their album. This song, 'Re Pura' has both Sinhalese and Hindi lyrics.. So listen up and lemme know.. I will put it up in a few hours.. :)
And also my mom shall support her writings with some audio feeds too!

P.S.: If you check out their site, the picture on Production Days 3, on the home page, has my picture with them. No one though, can recognise anyone in that picture :D
Wish that I could do my MSc Psych, in a different way. I started to do it through Mother Teresa University, and they are pretty messy with the Distance Edu thing. I might get myself transferred to another Univ.. I am just gonna look at the MPhil options now. And find out which univ gets me the best course, on Distance Edu of course. Lets see.. maybe another 3 years and I will have those Dr. letters before my name.

Vasudha Aunty happened to meet a lady and a gentleman who were the first Principals of Vidya Mandir, if I remember right. Happened that they both are extremely intellectual. While the lady remained single, the man married. It was like that in earlier, most women like her had to remain single, or chose to remain single.

I wonder why it is like this, and the men always find a supportive spouse. Is it that they dont find men who are mature enough to accept their intelligence.. I know of lots of men, have read about them, every tabloid has more or less talked about this 'phenomenon', wherein the men are pretty uncomfortable with their ladies, if they do better than they do, if they earn more than thet do, are more successful or popular in their careers, (and God forbid if they are in the same field and workplace) if they are not the typical home birds. Now why does this happen? This is something I am looking for answers to. In this Blog. Please comment away.. ! One answer to that was, that there is no love then. (Why I am concentrating on this love and marriage issue, I plan to counsel in Pre marital and Marital counselling). In love, there is no jealousy, they only want growth in each other. Even if it means that one is better than the other. And the typecasting that has been happening for ages, that the man is the gatherer and the woman is the nourisher or something like that, now since role reversals are happening all over the world, I think this is one of the reasons that marriages break. More than that, there is no tolerance. To answer the question of why did a marriage not work?? She/He just found the wrong man/woman..! (Except in cases of domestic violence, which also stems from the way the individual has been brought up,and the surroundings he has been in)
Well, I basically think there is no such thing as a wrong man or a woman, just that they dont know, sometimes, the right things that have to be done to make a marriage work. No tolerance and no giving in. And frankly there is no such thing as love in this day and age. Marriage has become a convenience. Arranged marriages check out all the pre-requisites and there are a set of people deciding whether two people should marry each other. And love marriages, same thing, more or less, except that they work on a basic attraction maybe...(?) and also maybe they think they 'know' the other. Whats the bottom line, to this looong winding analysis? Well something that I want to find out.. and I want to do that soon. Maybe its tolerance. And also compassion to each other. Or the lack of both. Not only in case of a spouse, but with parents, children, siblings...... And maybe its because people really have to love each other. Love as of now is pretty non existent. *sigh*

And though this post does concentrate on women and how times are unfair to them, I realise it happens the other way round too.. Peace..! I am not a feminist!

And two quotes by Swami Sivananda, one pertaining to the Anniyan post : " Do not bother yourself much about reforming this crooked world. Reform yourself first. Then the whole world can be reformed. How can you help the world when you yourself are weak and ignorant?"

"Open your hearts to compassion.................A compassionate heart is the abode of God.

I am liking today. Its monday and there is lot of activity happening. :)

Shake ..............

Well here goes... I experienced a very light earthquake last night... and turns out that I was the only one who felt it.. I am pretty sensitive I see.. there I was rapping away at my keyboard and I felt that my chair was slightly giving the drunk feel. Shaking in slowwww motion. And mom and another girl who was here, who didnt feel it. So I thought I must have been imagining ....

Answering some questions about how the Blog meet was, well I am usually not the type to go out and make friends. There were people who did that to me though, there were a few who recognised me. But since a lot of people were generally getting to know the others, must tell you that there were only 3 women, including me the rest were all men. Think there are not enough lady bloggers, and even if there are, they don't venture out. So off I went to play with Kribs' baby, and chat up with his wife, Sujani. It has been ages since we caught up, so this was a good oppurtunity for me. You can read up about it in this blog. And this. And of course it will be up on Kribs' soon. When it was time to leave, I met a girl, I forgot her name, very bubbly and outgoing and had a nice smile, who was coming to say bye to me while I was going to bye to her. So she quizzed me about my work, life. And met few other people. The other girl was from the New Indian Express. All at the time of leaving. Taking leave actually means having a conversation as is.! BTW didnt think I mentioned it was sponsored by Royal Enfield. They were willing to give us bikes.

And to Robbie, yes being someone popular can restrict your airing of your views. But we still do. We are not too public about it thats all. And yes those thoughts are mine. And btw, in the comments section of that post, my mom, Padmasani had put in her own. There were many times that she wished that she could become someone like that, so have I, but thankfully we didnt and dont and wont morph into repressed psychopaths. :)

Sunday, July 24, 2005

Yesterday's Blogger meet was good. Met a lot of new people. It was the first time that I went to Boat Club. It was a pretty beautiful place. And I checked out some people, ahem, boating, though the waters were pretty mucky!

And something new, as it has been pouring out here in Chennai, I asked mom whether I could drench myself in the rain. She said yes :) And off we went, me and Adi, to the terrace, and anyone watching us would have thought we were a couple of mad things, jumping and singing loudly.

There is something about the rain. When the intensity, decreases and increases, and when all the celestial lights go of and on with sound effects, it feels and looks very beautiful. And the rain can either make you feel joyful or desolate. There have been days, when it rained, and it used to leave a stillness in its wake, and I hated that. I still dont like it that much. One of the reasons, why I dont like weekends much too. Its very quiet. Too quiet for my liking. Yeah if I had been in the weekly grind, my view would be different.

I also wished yesterday, that with every raindrop falling on my head it would drop into my skull, a little bit wisdom. So that at the end of the rains, I will be one wise person. Knowing everything. And I wouldnt have to go through any sad 'learning experiences' again!! ;)

And with things I do, I would never make a mistake. ESPECIALLY in my musical delivery. I would never sing a wrong note, make a slip, you know, the works.... I would know who is a right person and who is not. What is a good situation and what is not, without really getting into trial and error. ;) hee hee.. asking for a lot I am. I would always do the right thing. I think what I am asking for now is foresight. To be able to look into the future. And to know whether I will be making any mistakes, whether I would hurt anyone, inadvertantly or otherwise, or be hurt, or like whether I drive my car badly, or mess up a lunch or a dinner, or get somewhere late where I should be on time, I would know it all. And I would never get into the situation. And with foresight. I would have learned from my mistake that I am about to make :)) LOL. But it would be good.

This stillness is very depressing. sigh!

Today morning was good .. went and played in the water at Gandhinagar Club. Tried very hard to stay afloat, but it was a very sad attempt. And now I am some 10 shades darker. And now my mother doesnt seem to recognise me. Very intelligent we were, Aditi and I, to choose the midday sun, and go into the pool without sunscreen. Well that was that, and I can only hope the tan wears off, and SOON!

We all then went to a place called Beach Palms, in Besant Nagar, to eat, but the fare was not that great. I might write about this soon on chennaionline.

I am thinking, I will also post some of the forwards that I get on sms, funny ones and otherwise.. would be good fun. And I think I will learn to swim in a week or so and then it will be joy!!!

So forward of the day --> What did Dela ware ?? Her New jersey. :)

Saturday, July 23, 2005

Yaaaaaayyyyy.... I think its gonna be a good weekend. There is a blogger meet at the Boat Club today, organised by Kiruba Shankar and I am looking forward to it.

I bought this Paulo Coelho's new book, Zahir. And I am also started the first few pages of Digital Fortress.

I saw Anniyan again last night at a private screening with mom, and Adi and her mom. Because Ad and aunty had not seen it. Hmm wish sometimes that there really was an Anniyan to cleanse all evil. Especially the history of Singapore, Taiwan.... I wonder what we are doing...


Thursday, July 21, 2005

Presentez Vous... My New Blogger Template

Generally got fed up of the green colour.. and the orange..Wanted to design my own but no time for that!!!
I like this one.. pristine.. pure.. clear!

Wednesday, July 20, 2005


And in Chennai... heavily.. I have not seen a rain like this in ages.. WOWWWWW.. I wanna go play in the rain.. and I can imagine mom saying "AWWMYGAWD" .. he he .. not really but since it doesnt rain that often in Chennai, they usually say not to get wet in the first rains... for some reason.. Bombay rains she allowed me to get wet as a kid.. :)
Ahh for happy times :)

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Very Happening Weekend

First I must thank all the good wishes that are coming in. Through email. And the comments here.

And I went for a show with Rahman Anna. The call came out of the blue. This was a charity show in Karaikkal. For the children affected in the Tsunami. NDTV was also involved.

Mom left on her work and this was basically the first time I went on a show out of town without mom.

Rehearsals happened on Sunday. And I met Sivamani sir for the first time. And before the rehearsals began full swing he played on the drums. It was a super treat. Its like the rhythm just flows on and on and on. Such innovation, such brains and such creativity. My God!

So first I was to sing Sakkarai and Kannathil Muthamittaal. And then songs got added much to my glee. I finally got to sing Thottal Poo Malarum, Vennilave, Telephone Manipol, and a prayer with Rahman anna, Hariharan Sir, Karthik and Madhudhree. We sang a bit of Shakthi Kodu. :)

Rahman anna said this was the first of his shows in this year.

We travelled from here to Pondichery on sunday evening, stayed there overnight and left from there to Karaikal. Another 3 hour journey which I will relish. I travelled along with G V Prakash, Rahman anna's nephew, (to enlighten, the kid voice of chiku buku chiku buku) now he is composing too. I sang a jingle for him a year ago. I guess brilliance is also in the genes. :) And Naresh Iyer. He is a find from the [V] Super Singer contest. And from what I hear, he is a singer to look out for. I met him on this show. And George. He has sung in Boys and Enakku 20 Unakku 18. He is great fun.

This was also the first time I came to know closely how to it is to rise up to an occasion. Songs that I have heard some hundred times but didnt have the lyrics to. Vennilave. First we were supposed to sing Tamil and then Hindi and then finally landed up singing the Tamil version on stage. I made frantic calls to Aditi to get me the lyrics and the poor thing sat here and kept giving me the lyirics on the phone. I had written it on a piece of paper. Then I lost it. Then I called her up again. And then this was the first show for which I didn't doll up. I totally didn't have the time. I went on stage with work slippers. Which I noticed mich later. If any hi funda magazine had covered this, I would have been on the pages of "how not to present yourself for a show" And then to top it, I lost my mom's phone, and my ear ring. Which Hari sir noticed and asked me where my ear ring was. I became a totally worked up and started sobbing. Then Hari sir was like ok loosen up and in less than a minute of my boo hoo, I had to go sing Thottaal with Hari sir. And he was like "cheer up baby". Collect yourself. You have to grow up he said. Mom cant be there to do all the stuff for you all the time. My God. Baby I am. But I learnt. Idiots like me have to learn the hard way I guess. And I have also been selfish. Its because of my incompetence and disorganisation that mom has not been able to attend to her work.

Rahman Anna opened the show with his song from Desam. The Tamil version of "Yeh Des Hai Tera". And he also sang Anbe Aaruyire from "A Aaah", S J Surya's movie. Sooper it is. Another rocking album it is going to be releasing tomorrow.

When the show was over, Sivamani sir said, because you lost something here, take it that Sani bhagwan has taken all the bad stuff away from your life. All your bad karma is gone with this. And may you come to the stage that you can buy 2400 phones. I felt very, very touched when he said that. I guess Rahman anna also came to know that and he asked me to cheer up.

I was not able to take any pictures. Except that I took a very short video before the concert and have a short clip of Rahman Anna singing.

From this show I learnt that I have a very long way to go and that I have to grow as a musician. Rise up to occasions and be good also.And I have to connect to God more. I want music to flow through me. I have so much to learn. And that knowledge happens a lot from the Sangat that you keep. This is Sahavaasa Punyam. Our generation does not have that advantage mom used to say. They learnt a lot from listening to elders speak, converse, learn from their intellectual gatherings and discussion. And whatever little I get when I go on a recording and a show like this, I lap it up. Expanding your horizons, really thinking out of the box... people keep saying about this but when it comes to doing it, thats when you realise, that you are generally wasting a lot of time. Keep growing, keep learning, keep evolving, continuously recognise and rectify one's flaws. And also that you learn from people both young and old. All this I learnt from this show and the recording that I did for Mangal Pandey.

The return drive was with Rehana aunty, Prakash and Naresh. Had dinner on the way. I also took a lot of pointers from Rehana aunty. Then I think I was just dozing and waking. And reached home at around 3 in the morning.

A very wonderful experience in all.

For now the mood and the song looping in my Player - 'Al maddath Maula'

"Tera Deewana hun Maula tera Parwana hun Maula sun
Ae Mere Maula Ae Mere Dhaata
Mujhko tu Manzil Bataade Muhjko tu Rasta Dikhade sun
Ae Mere Maula Ae Mere Dhaata....... "

Saturday, July 16, 2005

1:50 to 2:44

Thats the long and short of it .. he he.. my voice features for this length in the Holi song including the small phrase talking after Aamir Khan..

Friday, July 15, 2005

Breaking News....

Finally Its time to tell that I have sung in Mangal Pandey - The Rising.

Though its been a process which has happened over a year, I needed the time, to be sure, before I opened my trap about having sung for such a HUGE project.

And I was very adamant that ONLY Rahman Anna should give me my break in Hindi. Whether it be one line, or one song.

My experience of having met Javed Akhtar saab, Mr. Ketan Mehta,Mr. Ashutosh Gowariker who also happened to be there when recording this song, and something I didnt expect, interacting with Mr. Aamir Khan, whom I met two weeks back, when I was called in for a correction. Details shall follow shortly.

Once again I want to say one Huge thanks to Rahman Anna. For fulfilling my wish. And more than that, my mom. If not her, I am a nobody. Its not that I am harping on it, but no matter how many times I say how important Mom has been in shaping me, is and will be to nurture and bring a fuller musician, it is never enough, and people (also those who know us personally) dont ever ever seem to understand. Rahman Anna is Great. This line has a lot more meaning to it.

Maybe I shall try my hand at Podcasting with this song. A milestone in my career, and a milestone in my blogging tee hee.

Coming soon... to this blogspot near you !!!

Thursday, July 14, 2005

My Mom says further

Now let us see the two styles of Indian Music:

The fundamental definition of music is, ‘svato ranjayati – srotruchittam vahaamyaham. This means: By its very nature it pleases the listener instantly.

Both styles are based on Raga system. Having this as the basic ground we shall see how the differences in the two styles happen. The differences are noticed on the following lines:
1. The Role of Lyrics in the system of Music.
2. The approach to the basic ragas and their janyas.
3. The application of gamakas.
4. The Role of Percussion in each system.
5. The Time Theory and the Rag Bhairavi.
6. The lighter classical forms.
7. The concert pattern.

Without my planning so, there are seven aspects just as seven notes!

Lyrics: The southern music system of today can be traced back to about 65 years as a strong deviation from what it was before. Along with the freedom movement a whole new concert pattern evolved with lyrics and lyrics and lyrics (Sigh..) The creative aspects were on the wane particularly in terms of subtler aspects or aesthetically refined aspects. That was because of a large size of the audience with an aggressive mood of freedom struggle or a temple festival of emotional charge. The leisurely sessions at an enlightened or a critically appreciating audience was on the wane. People were changing, ambience was changing, atmosphere was changing. The purpose and significance of silence was gradually lost. So it was easy to adapt our music to a song orientation to set patterns and plans. The natural flow and the expansiveness of the canvas is lost.

In the case of the northern system, when the dhrupad transformed to Khayal singing, it became a welcome transition. Ghazals originally was not of a mundane type. They were love poetries addressed to God. This is exactly what we call as Madhura Bhakti as portrayed by Andal or Mira or Jayadeva or Krishna Chaitanya. All of them stirred the heart, churned your soul to take you ultimately to Him. Be it Krishna or Allah. This way we have more relevance and relatability with Mughals art and culture, and precisely the reason why we should forget language and religious barriers and simply drop into the nectar of pure music and devotion.

You can not deny the fact that the Mughals were and are endowed with a great sense of appreciation for aesthetics and niceties. While I write this a friend of mine sitting next to me says I should add “in ruthlessness also”.

There is something India had been proud about which I want to remind about. It is its ethos. The Hindu (The knowledge) system recognizes only the positive approach in documentation and research. Therefore the last adjective can be ignored as not relevant and out of place. That’s how the main priest of Rameshwaram Temple and Honourable Mr. Kalam’s father could be the best of comrades and the Ramanathapuram district still enjoys this Hindu Muslim camaraderie. That is how Bismillah Khan Saheb and his clan are associated with the Benares Hindu Temples. The two most important worship places are indicating as to what exactly we should do. But somewhere the calculations are going wrong. Kanakku Thapparadu.

Now coming back to the point, it is the supreme sense of aesthetic appreciation in the Mughals which made the transition of the Dhrupad to Khayal. The Mughals who were used to the soul stirring music replete with bhava wanted that Sukhanubhavam in the music of India too. Therefore the more technique oriented dhrupad moved to a more lilting and enratpturing Khayal form. Too many adjectives no! Ya. If you had been soaked in the enjoyment of Khayal music, you are also generous with your adjectives.

So practically speaking, the Mughals brought forth an elemental change to the music of the north and not a change in the music itself.

The lyrical content is very less to the extent that it is negligible. It is the artistry and the imaginary vision that is expressed and explored in each musicians raag. Therefore never is a raga tiresome, even from the same musician.

Now the rest in a later Blog.

Friday, July 08, 2005

My Mom Padmasani writes the following:

Arvind, I had written extensively about the Hindustani and Karnatak systems for this blog, but unfortunately the whole thing was lost as an unsaved document due to some error and I lost interest in redoing it. Because seldom does it come out as the same. Since you are not forgetting it, let me try again. By the by I am too small a person to give any verdict on Hindusthani vs Karnatak.

Hindusthani Music and Karnatak Music systems an Analysis

This is exclusively my view on the History of Indian Music after sustained research for so many years. It is time that we understand the core India and its ethos and unite together as Bharatvasis than fragmenting ourselves on a hundred thousand issues. It is time that we appreciate anything which is nice for the sake of its being nice rather than this vs. that or that vs. this. -Padmasani

Before going into the study let us know the meaning of these two very Indian terminologies.

Hindu means the knowledge system that prevailed in India. Sthan means the place. So Hindusthani Music means the music of the place where the Hindu system of knowledge prevailed.

And Karnataka can be interpreted at least in two different ways. a) Karnataka means of the people and the country they inhabit. b) Karna means ear and the old. Ataka means, that of the teacher- which means the karnaparampara or the aural tradition handed down from guru to pupil as an unhindered chain.

When the western authors like Day or Popley interpreted our music they called the music of the south as that which prevailed in the Deccan plateau. Unfortunately the sons of our soil prefer to go by the western authors on our music rather than probe the simple meaning from a Sanskrit dictionary. J

Anyway if you probe History there were only two distinct writers in Indian Music who could be traced as the earliest. They were Bharata and his Natyashastra and Ilango Adigalar who wrote the Silappadikaram. Both wrote amazing details about music and dance. Ilango also relates astrology with music. It is interesting to know that a man from a Royal Kingdom from the extreme south and a man from the extreme north have thought on identical lines. To them both, music was an umbrella term encompassing drama, dance and music. Anyway that shows the Aryan and the Dravidian cultural heritages as highly evolved. By and by the Dravidian tradition of the south was swallowed by the advent of Naik and Marattha Kingdoms. The dominant Telugu and Marathi literature and art forms took sway with which the music of the south also took a tumultuous turn. The Tamil music was replaced by the Aryan form with the Kannada, Telugu and Marathi regional musical and linguistic influence.

The north was no exception to this change. The Mughals brought a fair deal of influence of their own over our music. While the classical art form remained more or less the same, there were other forms like ghazals etc. which came into vogue. North also moved from Dhrupad to Khayal over the period of time. But it retained the originals intact. The music was intact in terms of predominantly creative and not set music.

To trace the textual origin, between Bharata (Natyashastra) and Sarngadeva (Sangita Ratnakara) the music was one Indian Music. By and by the bifurcation started to take place into two different styles of music. While the North retained the original Hindu Music which is raga oriented, the south adapted itself to a confluence of more than one regional influence. Now the music of the south was more lyrically emphatic and descriptive of a theme or subject. It is because the Harikatha was a famous musico-discourse form; the Bhajana Paddati with Radha Kalyana Mahotsav was of a thematic nature. The Kriti form itself served a multipurpose of being used in the above art forms than sailing as a pure musical entity. But one can not refuse that the Kriti form has served as archives of southern raga format. The kriti pool in each raga consolidates the scope of that raga under grammatical peripheries and aesthetic exuberances.

This will be evident if you would analyse the Dhrupad and the Ragam Tanam and Pallavi forms. They are similar.

In dhrupad style the tanam singing is kept alive and the pakhavaj almost equal to our mrdangam was the percussion accompaniment. Khayal is a form with akar alap and tan developed into a more attractive form with tabla as accompaniment.

This much on the short historical side of the two styles of Indian Music. The rest in a later blog.

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Discovered this singer Sarah Mc Lachlan.. she has this amaaaaaazing feel to the way she sings.. This is my fav song of hers.. I have heard only two.. Oe is the City of Angels. She has sung the title track in that one and 'I Will Remember You'

Somehow the lyrics to that song, go out to Jamuna. Most of it at least

I will remember you
Will you remember me
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

Remember the good times that we had
I let them slip away from, when things got bad
Clearly I first saw you smiling in the sun
Wanna feel your warmth upon me
I wanna be the one

I will remember you
Will you remember me
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

I'm so tired but I can't sleep
Standing on the edge of something much too deep
Funny how we feel so much we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, oh we can't be heard

I will remember you
Will you remember me
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

So afraid to love you but more afraid to lose
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose
But once there was a darkness, a deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, aww you gave me light

And, I will remember you
Will you remember me
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

I will remember you
Will you remember me
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

Weep not for the memories

"I Will Remember You" -- Sarah Mclachlan

Remembering is easy -- it's the forgetting that's so hard.
Someone up there, whoever it is, has a demented sense of humour.
A friend of mine lost her Father to a heart attack a couple of days ago. She was a very quiet kid during school. Hardly ever spoke, except to maybe answer the teacher's questions. Which anyway, she was not at the receiving end of at most times.
She reached out on orkut one fine day, I had even forgotten, if she didn't have a different name. Jamuna Maruth. I never knew she could write. And never, ever thought it would be this good. One more rule... Never judge a person's language from how they do during English class during school.

Its wicked how, you are given something, and then it is snatched away. Cruelly. And then we have to nurse our broken soul and say it was all for the best. And learn from it. God!!! Not another learning experience. Sometimes you have a say in it, and sometimes you don't. This is the time, when we need our parents most. You have grown up, have come to the level when parents sit across the table and speak to you, treat you as an equal, even though deep down, for a father, his girl is still and will always be his little girl. Who has to be protected, saved from the big, bad world. Usually the first to lift the kid, when she falls down and grazes her knee. And girls are always special. And how do I know all this ...?? God knows. My Father was never there. And what about her mom? How's life going to be, when she has run all through to get her children to this time, and from now on she can relax a little bit, put her feet up, and when she needs the companion, to drink the afternoon tea with, and laugh and have tiny squabbles, see grandchildren..... the space next to her; its empty. My heart goes out to her a lot more. Because, now we have almost got our wings, we shall fly out of our nest, and make our own ones. And her nest will be empty. When she needs the support, when she needs the hand that can steady her when she falters, when she needs that hand that can take her up the stairs when the lift is not working, the space next to her is empty.

But maybe, now, he is at a better position to guide his wife and his daughter, and be their guardian angel. Yes, they can't see him, but this time round, he has nothing else to do than see them all the time. And watch over them. When someone close to us passes on, to another realm, I believe that they become our link to God. God works through them too. Its easier for God to take care of us that way, through our own family maybe?

This is just to tell Jam, that this too shall pass. And there shall be light. A purer, whiter, cleaner, more beautiful light, to encircle, encompass, and cocoon. In which, she can revel in and grow. And evolve. And that I am with her in her time of sorrow. And I am also in a small way, going through what she is going through.

Like a line in the Beatles song "I am he and you are he, and you are me and we are all together".
So I am she and she is me. Take care Jam. You will survive this, and you will live a wonderful life that no one has ever lived before. Brace Yourself girl. May God be with you.
Actually, your Dad is with you.

Saturday, July 02, 2005

My blogs are now becoming few and far between. hmm...
After the rampage to cinema halls the past couple of weeks, night shows, deadlines, recordings, I could catch up on sleep only today.
Work wise things have been good. Yasas went back to Singapore. Aditi is super busy with her school. 12th std and all.
And some good things have been happening too. :)
A few of my friends got married. We were running from one to another. SO MUCH of driving. My restaurant reviews are soooooooo due.
Andrea's dance classes are happening full swing since she wants us o perform sometime in Aug end or Sept.
I still haven't retrieved my handy cam from a friend for two weeks now. wow.. funny how suddenly there is a lot of backlogue.
I got a request from an to publish mom's post on Amudhe Thamizhe on their website. Mom has to follow up on that.
For now Life is beautiful, busy, happy and joyful :)